Sunday, January 5, 2014

Volume Nine. Happy New Year!

Even though this blog has been largely dormant for this past year, we haven't forgotten about you, our reader. We've been working on increasing our distribution in the known world pretty hard all year, and a number of personal setbacks among the editorial and writing staff has led to us to producing only two issues for 2013- Volumes 8 & 9.

First off, the folks who prepaid for the Volume Two reprint have been refunded, since we have no idea when the next reprint issue will be ready. We're sorry for the mixup.

Secondly, I apologize for the way the cover to issue nine turned out. Here's how I originally designed the cover:

Here's how the printer "re-interpreted" the same image:

I guess the "abstract" design of my draft was too much for the printer to handle, so we ended up with a "Christmas green" bordered design with no title on the spine. Thanks fellas; I know I signed a contract that stipulated that the cover could be altered to meet printing requirements, but you've really outdone yourselves this time.

If I had contested the cover, this issue wouldn't come out until sometime in February. So I chose to accept the image as it was. For right or for wrong, this is Volume Nine. It is available now at our website:

We've also chosen to use this blog to highlight pages from our previous issues for those who would like a preview of what they're buying before they get it. We're beginning with this current issue. Again, if you like what you see, head over to our website and order as many copies as you can afford, then sell them on the black market to people who aren't aware we exist.

We've also had a chance to number our "first day" printings. The first 500 copies will be signed and numbered by the publisher. Boom- instant collector's item at no extra charge!

On with the previews. Happy New Year from The Ephemeris!

See ya next time!

Monday, July 8, 2013

Volume 8- In Stores Now!

Well, it took forever, but we have finally whipped up the eighth Volume of The Snuff Taker's Ephemeris. It's all killer, no filler. I could go through a long list of why this is the best issue we've come up with so far, but I'll refrain from spoiling the surprises we have waiting for you.

You can order your copy directly from us at  or you can go hunting for it at the bookstore (good luck...)

In the meantime, here's our new commercial. For some reason Youtube refuses to let us post our videos in 4:3 size anymore, so we apologize for the artificially stretched 16x9 widescreen ratio.

Happy reading!

PS, the awesome cover was painted by Ohio's own Rob Jones. You should go check out his website for more of his unique style of "found art":

Take care, and we'll be seeing you in a couple of months.

Sunday, February 10, 2013

Happy Valentine's Day

Even though it's a few days away, I just wanted to say Happy Valentine's Day to all of our readers, single or not. May Cupid's arrow slice straight thru your heart and cause massive internal hemorrhaging until you find your life mate.

Volume VII is out, with mainly positive reviews. The major error this issue (there's always at least one major error per issue) is that the spine reads "Volume One." I guess my "7" looks like a "1" so the printer got confused and misprinted the title. At least, that's the story I'm going with.

WE NEED YOUR FEEDBACK. What do you want to see in future issues? More of this, less of that, a little bit of something... just let us know where we can improve. Don't forget to write in and tell us. We always choose a "letter of the month" which entitles you to a free subscription, and we're also running our ongoing contest where we pick one lucky new subscriber to our blog, facebook or youtube page and set them up with a special gift.

From all of us here, thanks for reading and supporting the magazine, we can't do it without you!

Friday, December 14, 2012

Lotsa New Stuff On Sale Now!

First, from out of left field: The Snuff Taker's Ephemeris Volume One- Master Edition.

The Master Series is what we're calling our new series of reprints that will put our first four issues back into print in a deluxe format. It contains all of the content from the original printing, plus a couple dozen pages of bonus features. This new version is the same size and format as our current issues, NOT the digest-size of the original printings. One of the biggest complaints we've had about our new direction is that Volumes 5&6 completely dwarf Volumes 1-4 when placed on a bookshelf. Not anymore!

Ordinarily I discourage double dipping, but I wholeheartedly recommend buying the Master Series even if you own the original printings. There's just no comparison in quality. Plus, all the additional behind-the-scenes features won't be printed anywhere else, so you HAVE to buy this edition. It's the law.

Volumes 2-4 will be reprinted over the course of 2013. These are not available in b&m bookstores, only online at our site or from other retailers.

2. The Snuff Taker's Ephemeris Volume Seven

Due to hit stores Christmas Day, we're putting the finishing touches on our fourth quarter Winter special. It's got tons of great articles and is going to be another nice thick edition like our last one. Order it now and save 1.00 off the cover price!

3. Subscriptions!

It only took two years, but we were finally able to install a subscription delivery service. We've got a few different packages you can choose from. All subscriptions begin with the next issue. For example, Volume Seven comes out on December 25th, so if you order a sub between now and then, it will start with Volume 7. After December 25th, it will begin with Volume Eight. Confused? There's more!

The GREAT news is that US subscribers will get free shipping (a 16.00 value)! The bad news is that we couldn't offer our international subscribers free shipping. We're really sorry for our friends in Europe, Oz and Africa. But that doesn't mean you can't still get free stuff out of us:

4. Contest!


Frankly, our social media sites are looking pretty dead. Our blog page, our Facebook page and our Youtube videos aren’t getting any hits. You would think that we had a circulation of 40 copies or so by the looks of things. This doesn’t really inspire confidence in an on-the-fence customer or retailer. Who wants to order three copies of a magazine that only has 46 views of their latest Youtube commercial? (We wouldn’t.)

So we’re bribing (err... “reaching out to”) our readers for help. Watch those videos. Like them. Subscribe to our blog. Connect with us on Facebook and give us a thumbs up for every stupid post we make, just as you do for that hot girl you know from Starbucks who always writes something like “LOL jst walked into a wall” and ends up getting 2,366 ‘likes.’ Be our pals.

Each month, we’ll choose one lucky (?) poster from each outlet to win a random prize. It could be a year’s subscription to the magazine. It could be a rare, out of print back issue. It could be some of the free stuff that we get at conventions and have no use for. (Ooohh... check out this neat USB Flash Drive carrying pouch they gave us in Louisiana!) Or it could be cash money! (Actually, no it can’t. We’re broke.)

If only half of our readership were to connect with us on Facebook or Youtube, we would have thousands of internet “friends,” which we all know are more important than the real-life kind. So head over to these sites and get bizaay:



5. Super Secret Special Publication

If you've heard rumors that the STE has put together a special Holiday publication, you heard right. We're not advertising it anywhere but in Volume Seven. Supplies are extremely limited and all proceeds will be donated to charity. See our ad in that issue to find out the details. In short, you'll be helping a good cause, getting a rare book, and the donation is pretty cheap to boot. The only hint is that it will make a great stocking stuffer for children or adults, and we say that without the slightest bit of sarcasm.

...till next time!

Monday, November 12, 2012

STE Volume VI

We want to thank you all for making this issue our most memorable yet! If you haven't bought your copy yet, get it here:

I have noticed that the printers screwed up one page. This is how page 35 was supposed to look, but the graphic on the right got chopped off, leaving a big blank space. Sorry for the mixup.

Saturday, October 13, 2012

Sorry for the delay...

Volume VI should have shipped out last Tuesday, but we're still waiting on the printer to get done with them. Apparently since we're sixty pages bigger than our last issue, we broke all the printing presses or something. Anyway, word is that it should start shipping next week (week of October 15th) so let's all hope this is true.

Meanwhile, the digital edition started shipping yesterday, so there's one small consolation. Reader feedback so far has been incredible, so if you haven't yet ordered your copy, DO IT!